3 Signs You’ve Found Your ‘Twin Flame’


As an Intimacy Expert for 20 yrs, I am both a master of my craft and an ever evolving student. What I think many people refer to as ’Twin Flames’, is congruent with what the late Dr. Barbara Marx Hubbard coined as, ‘Whole Mate’ Relationships…. An evolution past the ‘Soul Mate’ stage of relationships.

‘Whole Mates’ literally join ‘geniuses’. The whole is greater than the sum of the parts. They awaken the other’s innate evolutionary spark not just for self fulfillment, not just for a thriving relationship, yet also for the evolution of humanity.


Signs that you have found your ’Twin Flame’/ ‘Whole Mate’ and NOT another ‘Soul Mate’ relationship are:


♋️ ‘Soul Mates’ have such intense chemistry that they often forget about or neglect family, friends, workouts and their purpose to uplift the planet.

‘Twin Flames’/ ‘Whole Mates’ lives are enriched, enlivened and uplifted physically, emotionally, vocationally, financially, socially, family wise and romantically…. Their purpose is inspired by one another, to live their ‘genius’ even more fully, as a gift to humanity.

This could look like you thriving independently on your own yet once in relationship with your ‘Whole Mate’, you get your book finally finished, or you finally say yes to Head Coach the soccer league of Coaches.


♋️ ‘Soul Mates’ are drawn together inwardly for emotional healing of shadows, wounds, traumas.

‘Twin Flames’/’Whole Mates’ aren’t ‘perfect’ yet they’ve done a great deal of inner work and inspire one another to even more deeply and joyfully serve humanity, uplift consciousness and heal the planet.

This could look like you thought you were authentic in the bedroom before yet you’re inspired to let go even more, surrender even deeper, show up even more aligned with what turns on your Soul.


♋️ ‘Soul Mates’ tend to misunderstand that they need each other to be complete.

‘Twin Flames’/ ‘Whole Mates’ COME to the relationship already complete. Their dynamic is 1+1=11, where each ignites the fullness of each other’s unique gift to humanity, giving from the overflow. 

This could look like you were financially stable before, healthy and living your purpose, yet your partner is such a mirror to your truest ruthlessly authentic self that you create another stream of income so you can truly travel as much as you want or wake up ready to embrace the day more certain than ever why you’re here, while also being less attached to the result.

Now, let’s not misunderstand that your ‘Whole Mate’ is fixing you, or that you’re not able to create phenomenal results on your own. What we’re talking about here is more flow, more inspiration, more ease, more support and a true awakening of a capacity that was latent until you were this elegantly matched with someone who brings out the best in you.


Because you did your inner work to be whole, not perfect. 🙃  And, you were relentless in your unwillingness to settle on what really matters in your partnership, which creates a vibration of:  YES LET’S FULLY DO THIS! To the Universe, which responds with a high vibrational match.

My recommendation is to first commit to doing your inner work to be ‘whole’ so you don’t attract another (often painful or tumultuous) ‘Soul Mate’ relationship. Then profoundly CHOOSE to have a ‘Whole Mate’ relationship so you can experience the fullness of your unique evolutionary self, for the uplifting of our planet! And enjoy the process of showing up unattached as you put one foot in front of the other until you meet them. 😉 

Remember, even when you find your ‘Twin Soul’/ ‘Whole Mate’, it doesn’t mean that you stop doing your inner work, it doesn’t mean you stop feeding the relationship.

Every relationship requires regular feeding and care to thrive. However, this kind of relationship feels like someone’s putting wind in the sails of your ship. All the inner work is paying off projected externally as your very life.

Savor the journey.

And if you’re struggling with the ‘becoming whole’ part…  If you can’t forgive the past, if your heart’s been crushed and you’re afraid to open it again, if you honestly don’t know how to communicate in a connected present effective way, if you yearn for the kind of sacred sexual connection you read about, or if you just haven’t come home knowing you’re enough… The ‘Intimacy Blind-spot’ is the culprit.

Don’t worry, I can’t see mine either. Yet until we breakthrough our blind-spots, we can’t evolve into ‘Whole Mates’ – instead we keep attracting ‘Soul Mates’ to show us our shadows.

If you’re curious to see what blind spots you have that may be making intimate relationships a challenge, take my simple, quick yet effective Intimacy Blind-spot Assessment so you can breakthrough: www.AllanaPratt.com/quiz

We got this. You CAN change. 🙏💝🙏

And if you choose a ‘Whole Mate’ relationship, they ARE out there. Let’s do the work so that you find them or they find you 😉 

Allana ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜


Written on 8 June, 2020



Intimacy Expert, Allana Pratt is a global media personality and go-to authority for those who have suffered heartbreak and are ready to live unapologetically, and attract an open-hearted, ideal relationship.

Her vulnerability and courage landed her a featured weekly column on the GoodMenProject, featured as an Icon of Influence, and as a Guest Expert on Huffington Post, People Magazine, Forbes, CBS & FOX and The Jenny McCarthy Show.

This Ivy League grad is the Author of 4 books, has interviewed Whoopi Goldberg and Alanis Morissette, and Hosts the edgy Podcast “Intimate Conversations” where listeners learn how to find the relationship they deserve. A certified coach, Allana was asked by Leeza Gibbons to coach her during Dancing with the Stars. With close to 5 million viewers on YouTube, Allana supports non profits like ‘Rise of the Butterfly’ to end human trafficking while offering private coaching and retreats so that her clients have a thriving intimate relationship with themselves first, which naturally attracts and enhances their ideal partnerships.

Contact Allana directly at: www.AllanaPratt.com